Recently I asked you, “When you take the word ‘can’t’ out of your vocabulary, what do you find yourself saying instead?”
This question prompted Sharifa Karen Krongold PsyD. to write the following email to me:
Sharifa wrote –
My friend gave me an amazing tip.
I said to him “I really want to do that hour-a-day meditation with support, but I just can’t make the time for that.”
He said to me, “Why don’t you just tell yourself the truth? You don’t really want to. If you wanted to do it, you would.”
Now, that is not always the answer to “I can’t,” but it was an astounding insight for me. I stopped being a victim to my “I can’t.” I knew that if I really wanted to meditate an hour a day, I would make it happen. It was very empowering.
As Sharifa saw so clearly, when you pull “I can’t” from your vocabulary, you get down to the truth in a big hurry.
She went on to say, “‘I can’t’ has been one of my ongoing personal quicksands. Realizing that ‘I just don’t really want to’ has been very empowering.” I admitted to her, and now you, “When I say ‘I can’t,’ I usually mean ‘I don’t know how to do this, this scares me’ or ‘this all looks way too big to me.'”